Pastor wellness: How does a church know it’s caring well for its pastor?

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The bivocational pastor leaves work around 5 p.m., but his day is far from over.

Three sermons still need preparation this week, a church member is in the hospital, and another family is struggling. He wants to be fully present with his own family, but too often they receive what remains after everyone else has taken their share.

By the time he sits down to prepare, much of his emotional and mental energy has already been spent elsewhere. Then his phone buzzes. “Pastor, when you get a chance …”

Most pastors know that phrase rarely means “when you get a chance.” For many ministry leaders, those words point to something deeper. According to Lifeway Research, 67% of pastors say they feel they must be on call 24 hours a day.

Availability can gradually become expectation, and expectation eventually shapes culture. The question isn’t simply whether pastors carry burdens. They always will. The question is whether the church helps carry them or simply adds to them.

By Sunday morning, people see a prepared sermon and a familiar smile. What they often don’t see are the hours behind it, the emotional weight, and the question running through a pastor’s mind: How long can I keep this up?

The pastoral burden

The pressures vary from one setting to another, but the pattern is often the same. Much of what pastors carry remains invisible to the people they serve. One shepherd serves bivocationally, balancing work, ministry, and family while feeling as though each needs more than he can give.

Another pastor is younger. He prays for more families to come, greater kingdom impact, and more opportunities for ministry. God answers. Attendance rises, staff is added, ministries expand, and the church gains momentum. In many ways, this is exactly what he hoped for, but growth brings pressures he didn’t anticipate.

Sermons still require preparation, but now staff need supervision, budgets demand attention, conflict surfaces in unfamiliar places, and leadership feels more complex than he imagined when ministry began.

Another pastor serves in a community that no longer resembles the place where his church was built. New families move in. Culture shifts. Methods that once naturally connected don’t connect as easily now.

He wrestles with questions many pastors ask, but few say aloud. How do we reach people we no longer naturally understand? How do we honor our history without becoming trapped by it?

Pastors don’t usually wake up one morning exhausted and ready to quit. Weariness usually builds slowly. I spend time with pastors who love their churches deeply yet carry a fatigue they struggle to name.

They absorb grief that’s not their own, live with the steady pressure of always being needed, feel guilty when they rest, and sometimes begin to believe that disappointing people means disappointing God. Many would simply say they’ve run out of margin, while still trying to carry everyone else’s burdens.

Still, pastors keep preaching, answering calls, and sitting beside grieving families. The work continues, even when there is little left to give.

The church’s role in caring for pastors

When pastors live depleted for long stretches, churches eventually feel the effects, not because pastors are weak, but because they’re human.

Churches rarely set out to exhaust their pastors. More often, expectations accumulate quietly until faithfulness becomes difficult to separate from constant availability.

Over time, congregations can begin to equate endless effort with commitment and exhaustion with devotion. A church should notice when its praising patterns that slowly wear a pastor down.

Jesus withdrew to pray, stepped away from crowds, and rested. Yet many pastors feel guilty practicing what He modeled.

Galatians 6:2 reminds believers, “Carry one another’s burdens; in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ” (CSB). That includes burdens carried by pastors.

Caring for pastors doesn’t mean lowering expectations or reducing commitment. Faithful ministry has always required sacrifice. But churches should ask whether sacrifice has quietly become too much.

First Thessalonians 5:12-13 calls believers to recognize those who labor among them. Biblical honor is not sentimental. It takes shape in the way a church shares burdens, respects limits, and supports long-term faithfulness.

Recognizing those who labor among us requires more than appreciation or a gift card during Pastor Appreciation Month. It may mean protecting a pastor’s day off, encouraging counseling before crisis, asking honest questions about family health, making sure one person is not carrying responsibilities meant for many, and paying a pastor in a way that matches the weight of the work.

“Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to give recognition to those who labor among you and lead you in the Lord and admonish you, and to regard them very highly in love because of their work. Be at peace among yourselves.” 1 Thessalonians 5:12–13, CSB

Churches don’t usually intend to wear down their pastors, but good intentions aren’t enough. When expectations go unspoken and burdens go unnoticed, one person can end up carrying what God designed the body to share. That realization should not produce guilt. It should lead to action.

Next steps for churches

Before asking whether pastors are faithful enough, churches may need to ask a harder question. Have we created a setting where those leading us can stay healthy enough to keep going? The answer should show up in what a church actually does.

Churches should look honestly at where pressure is building and where expectations have become too heavy. They should ask whether their culture rewards constant accessibility more than faithful leadership.

Protect the pastor’s day off. Share work that should not rest on one person alone. Encourage counseling, retreat, or Sabbath rhythms before things reach a breaking point. Make it normal for a pastor to speak candidly without fearing disappointment, suspicion, or lost trust.

Churches should also talk plainly about compensation. Fair and sufficient pay is part of caring well for a pastor. When pay is too low, pastors and their families often carry financial strain on top of the spiritual and emotional weight of ministry.

If a church says it loves its pastor, that love should show up in the culture it creates, the burdens it helps carry, and the support it provides. A church does not truly honor its pastor if it praises his faithfulness while depending on his exhaustion.

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Chris Reynolds is the lead strategist for the Georgia Baptist Mission Board's Pastor Wellness team, supporting pastors, ministry leaders, and their families across Georgia. This article first appeared on Lifeway Research.

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